Thursday 19 April 2012 by Spacey

UK starts 115-day countdown to Olympic closing ceremony


After London 2012 chairman Seb Coe unveiled a giant set of Olympic rings, made up of 20,000 flowers to mark the 100-day countdown to the opening ceremony, the UK public have begun their very own 115-day countdown to when it’s all over.

£9.3bn in UK public funding has been set aside to cover the cost of the Games, and government attempts to persuade the population that they should be beside themselves with excitement have been met with a level of apathy usually associated with a sales assistant at B&Q.

Amongst the other events to mark the countdown to the opening ceremony was the unveiling of a huge white elephant at Marshgate Lane in Stratford.

Culture Secretary Jeremy Hunt said: “I think the time to ask people if it’s good value for money is after we’ve had the Olympics and they can see it’s been good for the country.”

“You only have to look at how Greece has prospered since they hosted the Olympics to see how….oh, wait.”

Olympic countdown

Members of the public are struggling to understand how spending vast amounts of money on what amounts to a glorified egg and spoon race should be something to be enthusiastic about.

“I’m really looking forward to the closing ceremony,” revealed a thoroughly unimpressed Graham Barton from Lincoln.

“It will be a real celebration of not having to hear about how brilliant I’m supposed to think it is.”

“The only thing I’m likely to gain from this event is an unnatural craving for Coca Cola and Big Macs.”

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