Tuesday 20 March 2012 by Spacey

Women reluctant to join Dennis Waterman’s pub quiz team


After New Tricks star Dennis Waterman insisted that it is okay to hit women that are cleverer than him, women everywhere revealed their reluctance to join the actor’s local pub quiz team.

Waterman, who admitted to hitting ex-wife Rula Lenska because she was better at arguing than him, has been left puzzled by the lack of female applications to join his quiz team.

“I don’t understand it,” he said.

“As long as they don’t answer questions that I don’t know the answer to, then they’ll be absolutely fine.”

“It’s only when women get all mouthy, demonstrating their knowledge and articulating themselves with words and stuff that we have a problem.”

Dennis Waterman’s domestic violence

The former Minder actor went on to justify his treatment of his ex-wife by claiming her wanton displays of intelligence drove him to it.

“There was an instance when Rula and I paired up to take on some friends in a game of Trivial pursuits,” he revealed.

“The first question was ‘What is the capital of Columbia? Quick as a flash, Rula said ‘Bogota’.”

“I was fuming! I mean, how dare she know the answer to something that I was pretty unsure about.”

“There’s only so much a man can take. She was picking that plastic cheese out of her teeth for weeks after that.”

Female quiz fans have said that being repeatedly punched in the face for knowing the answer to general knowledge questions would take the fun out the light-hearted pub game, with one telling us:

“I’m happy to take part if there’s a cash prize or a meat hamper, but I draw the line at having my head slammed into a urinal.”

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