Monday 19 December 2011 by Spacey

The tax you pay is less than 1/50th of what it cost us to bail you out, public remind banks


After banks highlighted how much they provide in tax revenue, the public have been quick to remind them how minuscule that figure is in comparison to the amount of taxpayers money they have spunked up the wall in the last few years.

Business Secretary Vince Cable revealed on Sunday that the government would accept “in full” the recommendations by Sir John Vickers in his report on banking.

However he also confirmed that the reforms would be carried out in slow motion over a period of time longer than it took allied forces to defeat the Nazis in World War 2.

Barclays boss Bob Diamond claims that the reforms will end up costing the entire banking industry up to £7bn, but with the total cost of the bailout believed to have cost the taxpayer in the region of £850bn, the vast majority of the public are failing to give any form of a shit.

“I’m no mathematician, but I don’t need a calculator to work out that subtracting the amount they have cost us from the amount they contribute would equal a very large number preceded by a minus sign,” said one disgruntled taxpayer.

Banking reforms

Chancellor George Osborne will be to fighting back the tears as he outlines the extent of the reforms to MPs later today in what is expected to be an emotional announcement.

“It will be difficult for George,” revealed a government spokesperson.

“The good news is that given the length of time banks have to implement the changes it should provide them with ample time to come up with some new and exciting ways they can provide their customers with extra charges to help get the money back.”

“If George can focus on that like we practiced in rehearsals then I think he’ll get through it without crying.”

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