Wednesday 28 September 2011 by Waylandsmithy

EC leaders in Athens describe austerity buffet as ‘challenging’


As Europe’s financial leaders arrive in Athens to discuss the Euro crisis, there are fears that the perilous state of the Greek economy could have repercussions for the quality of their lunch.

“We have made every effort to meet with Greece in the past, they used to put on a lovely spread”, complained Jose Manuel Barroso, his stomach audibly rumbling.

“We would grasp the challenges Greece put in front of us, mull over some of their less savoury affairs and find a way of cramming in as much as possible, in one sitting. And afterwards, we would discuss the debt crisis.”

But as senior members of the IMF confirmed, it is hard to concentrate on international economics when there’s only a couple of dry pittas and some stale olives to look forward to.

“These are testing times”, tweeted Rolf Falter, a Belgian EU official. “Where’s the suckling pig and baklava? Let’s hope the next country to default has cakes.”

Greece austerity buffet

Angela Merkel struck a conciliatory tone with the other leaders, and offered to share her bread sticks.

But as the half-bottle of retsina ran dry, chief economists predicted that Greece would be ejected from the Eurozone, unless they came up with stuffed fig leaves and Ouzo.

Prime Minister George Papandreou fears the meeting went badly.

As he swept the floor and turned off the main lights, the Greek leader wished he could have done more to entertain the international banking community. “They were clearly disappointed, they’re used to a rich diet of pounds upon pounds of flesh.”

“I wasn’t expecting a lot of credit for my bubble and squeak in hot water, but I had hoped they might leave a tip.”

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