Tuesday 20 September 2011 by Spacey

Conservatives laundry piling up as Lib Dem conference enters 4th day


With the Liberal Democrat conference entering its 4th day, Conservatives have begun to question their coalition partner’s commitment after it was revealed that a number of household tasks and cleaning chores at Conservative Party Headquarters haven’t even been started yet.

With the conference expected to continue well into Wednesday, senior Tories have expressed their anger at reports of dirty dishes piling up on draining boards, dustbins not being put out and laundry baskets overflowing with dirty clothes.

“This isn’t good enough,” said a government spokesperson.

“It’s all very well them gallivanting off with their little pipe dreams about changing this and doing that, but my shoes won’t bloody well clean themselves.”

Lib Dem conference

Secretary of State for Communities and Local Government, Eric Pickles, who is believed to have lost 3lbs in weight sitting at his dining table waiting for Chris Huhne to bring him his meals, expressed his anger at the Conservative’s coalition partners.

“Where are my f*cking chips and gravy!” he fumed.

Prime Minister David Cameron issued a stinging criticism of his Deputy, Nick Clegg.

“The country faces a very difficult and challenging future, but that’s nothing compared to the mountain of ironing Nick’s got waiting for him the next time he visits Number 10.”

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