Wednesday 31 August 2011

Gender pay gap top of our to-do list for 2109, claim men


Gender pay gap to last 98 years

Women have been told that the gender pay gap will become a thing of the past after men everywhere said it was at the very top of their to-do list for the year 2109.

The study found that men have a lot of important things to be getting on with over the next 98 years, but once they’re taken care of, pay equality will have their undivided attention.

Man Simon Williams told us, “The gender pay gap is extremely important to myself and my fellow Y chromosome owners.  Which is why it’s up there on my to-solve list, just below rocket shoes and nuclear fission.”

“I tell you now, the day we’re all flying around on a pair of new Nikes powered by cheap renewable emission-free nuclear energy is the day you’ll be earning the same as us.”

“It’s coming ladies, you have our word.”

Gender pay gap

However some groups of men have said the current situation is just fine, thank you very much.

Mid-level executive Mike Jones told us, “Women have to think if this is really what they want, because right now they can market themselves as being like men, only cheaper – that’s a valuable unique selling point in my opinion.”

“Then there’s the fact that they live five years longer on average, so their lifetime earnings often exceed those of men, but you never hear that, do you?”

“Plus they retire earlier – so maybe if they weren’t so work shy they would earn more?”

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