Monday 22 August 2011

Colonel Gaddafi urged to hide somewhere better than Saddam’s farmhouse cellar


Colonel Gaddafi looking for a good hiding place

As Colonel Gaddafi’s Libyan regime moved towards total collapse last night, officials confirmed he is keen to be remembered for hiding somewhere better than a small farmhouse cellar.

With his compound coming under increasing pressure from rebel forces, it has been suggested by military officials that Gaddafi’s top advisors will currently be looking for the best hiding places in which he can eventually be found.

As one military strategists told us, “As he seeks to escape the inevitable he is definitely going to hide like a coward, I think we all know that – but where? That is the question.”

“This is how he’ll be remembered forever, so we can only hope he goes for a really amazing hiding place, the sort where we all go, ‘I’d never have thought of looking there’.”

“I think we were all happy when they found Saddam Hussein, but he was only hiding in a small cellar under a farmhouse – I mean, really. It was a little insulting to be honest.”

Gaddafi to hide

Television viewers glued to the 24-hour coverage across multiple news channels have insisted that their expectations are high.

Viewer Sam Matthews told us, “I’ve been watching since last night, and only I hope Gaddafi puts a bit of effort into his hiding place.”

“You only have to look at his wardrobe to know he’s a showman at heart, so I think his hiding place will be pretty special.”

“If it turns out he was found whilst hiding under the coffee table I’ll be furious.”

“Imagine the stories that will be told if he’s eventually found in wandering down Tripoli’s main street in a pantomime horse. It’s the stuff of legends.”

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