Thursday 7 July 2011

Ricky Hatton to spend more time with breakfast


Boxer and former two-weight World Champion Ricky Hatton has announced his immediate retirement from the sport in order to spend more time with his breakfasts.

Hatton told reporters that it was time to hang up his gloves and dedicate himself to the most important meal of the day.

The ‘Hitman’ said, “I’ve had a great career, but over the years I’ve neglected my English breakfasts in order reach the top in my sport, but now it’s time to put feeding time back to the top of my list of priorities.”

“Just this morning I spent a wonderful hour with eight sausages and half a loaf of fried bread, and I can honestly say I’ve never been happier.”

“This is a new chapter for me, and one I’m excited to experience. Only today I learned about white pudding, so who knows what other amazing opportunities are around the corner?”

Ricky Hatton retiring

Manchester cafes have welcomed the move, claiming that takings are already 25% up on 2010 thanks to Hatton’s decision to retire from boxing.

One cafe owner told us, “The man’s a champion, and he takes breakfast as seriously as any fight in his career.  It doesn’t matter what you put in front of him, he’ll knock it down time and time again.”

“He’s like a machine when he’s in ‘the zone’.  Trust me, if I was a fried breakfast in Manchester, I’d be terrified.”

“His 2011 record is 128-o, not one fry-up has come close to beating him, and like Ricky himself says, ‘the bigger they are, the more satisfying the victory’.”

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