Thursday 30 June 2011 by @JohnnyBeelzebub

Murdoch allows government to allow him to take over BSkyB


A group of people controlled by Rupert Murdoch has approved the sale of BSkyB to a group of people controlled by Rupert Murdoch.

News Corp chairman Murdoch has mandated that the government which he controls with one hand, insist upon several key conditions that the company he controls with his other other hand must agree to.

The conditions include having Sky News’ Articles of Association and an independent editorial director approved by the government – conditions to which News Corp is expected to agree, because they came up with them.

Media analyst Simon Matthews told us, “What we have here is a perfect example of corporate Chinese whispers, and as long as the conditions haven’t changed too much between the time Murdoch gave them to the government, and having the government replay them back to him, everything should be just fine.”

“Of course, it’s possible someone in the Lib Dems has tried to muddy the waters by adding a clause or two, but I’d imagine Murdoch would soon spot that and have them removed.”

BskyB takeover

The official consultation will run until 8 July, when Secretary of State for Culture Jeremy Hunt will take a final decision on whether he should allow the takeover, or if he should risk destroying his career and the public image of himself, and every member of his family, living and dead.

An unnamed Whitehall insider told us, “It’s a tough one, certainly.  Do you bend to the iron will of a billionaire antipodean megalomaniac, or do what everyone knows to be the ‘right thing’.”

“Of course, he’s hampered in his decision making by having the morals of a Tory MP, so it’s a forgone conclusion, unfortunately.”

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