Wednesday 22 June 2011 by Spacey

Car drivers slowly rediscovering their legs, reveals RAC report


The rising cost of petrol has forced a third of drivers to attempt to reach nearby destinations using only the parts of their bodies located below the waist, an RAC report has suggested.

Tasks such as popping to the shop for a paper or nipping to Freaky John’s to score some crack, have taken on a whole new dimension as a result of spiralling fuel prices.

35% of the motorists surveyed revealed that they have had to undertake journeys on foot that have stretched beyond their driveways.

The survey of 1000 drivers earlier this year indicated lazy people were hardest hit, as public transport was often not an alternative due to bus stops rarely being located within eight feet of their front doors.

Just bloody walk

RAC motoring strategist, Adrian Tink has urged the government to cut fuel duty to help those who would rather starve than endure the humiliation associated with getting a bus.

“It’s outrageous that drivers should have to run the risk of getting AIDS or some other ghastly bus-related disease because of the unfair cost of petrol.” he insisted.

The survey found that 70% of drivers think that winding down the window and shouting ‘Bus wankers!’ at people in bus shelters should be a right not a privilege.

64% also revealed that it should be considered a driving skill to be able to change the CD on their stereos while texting their mates and eating an apple.

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