Friday 15 April 2011 by Formelia Alberthine

Pilot who failed to kill Nigel Farage convicted of threatening to make good his failure


The pilot who failed to kill Nigel Farage by crashing the plane containing both of them on polling day for the 2010 general election, has been convicted of threatening to make amends for his initial failing.

A jury found Justin Adams guilty of making five threats in relation to the former UKIP Leaders general well-being, one declaring his intent to fraternise with people who weren’t born in the UK.

Presiding Judge Baker revealed the challenges he faced in coming to his guilty verdict.

“As fanciful as the threats sounded given the accused could do little more than offer Mr Farage a bloody nose from a plane crash, one wonders what his next course of action would have resulted in.”

“We simply could not take the risk of him failing again, and undoubtedly placing the lives of the public in grave danger in the process.”

Farage threats

The judge continues, “I had to weigh in my mind, the overall net worth of an antagonistic relic cut from the same wretched cloth as Enoch Powell being allowed to go under at the hands of his former pilot, or the risk posed to the general public by allowing the inciteful language used by Mr Farage to continue unabated.”

“After much thought, I came to the conclusion that unfortunately I had no choice but to announce a guilty verdict for the accused.”

Mr Farage was quick to commend the judge for arriving at the guilty verdict.

“I can appreciate the difficulties the judge had in coming to the decision. When you have the word of two white people going head to head, it’s always difficult to decide.”

“That’s the one reason to be thankful of foreigners. They really do help speed up the judicial process.”

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