Wednesday 30 March 2011

Enquiry into how ‘fake bomb’ was delivered on time and to correct location


An urgent investigation has been launched into how a fake bomb was posted in the UK and yet was delivered on time and to the correct address in a completely different country.

The UK Department said it was taking the incident very seriously, and a full enquiry would look at how it made everything else delivered from the UK look completely inefficient.

A spokesperson said, “There are lessons to be learned here, definitely.  If they can do it this once, there is no reason why all of our parcels can’t be delivered correctly.  That should be the target.”

“We’re not saying it will be easy, but we have a dream that one day everything posted gets where it’s supposed to in a time-frame any normal person would consider reasonable.”

“Hopefully this is a sign of things to come.”

Fake Bomb sent to Turkey

Though the accurate and timely delivery has impressed many logistics analysts, there are a number of consumers left angry by the seemingly preferential treatment given to pretend terrorists.

Regular user of a number of postal services Mike Jameson told us, “I want answers, and I want them now!”

“How is it that this fake bomb can arrive in Istanbul precisely when expected, yet the birthday present I sent my sister arrived a week late and was given to an old lady on the next street?”

“It’s simply unacceptable.  And I bet this enquiry will be a complete whitewash – they’ll probably attribute the successful delivery to a series of one-off coincidences, and fortuitous circumstances.”

“It’s one rule for the pretend terrorists, and another for the rest of us.”

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