Friday 11 March 2011 by Brump

Glee pays tribute to role of paedophiles in modern pop music


In the latest instalment of the vomit-inducing, high school musical cack pile, makers of the hit show have paid tribute to the role played by child molesters in shaping modern pop music.

Last week’s US episode of the sugary shit-storm saw the cast of auto-tuned automatons at the wedding rehearsal for our forth coming royal wedding.

Prince Andrew led the choir of suspiciously post-pubescent schoolchildren in the serenading of lonely priests and bishops, with an array of songs written and made popular by well-known paedophiles.

The show’s producer told us, “Well, when you make a hit show based around painfully attractive sexed-up school kids, at some point you have to take a step back and pay homage to the group of people who made the show possible, kiddy fiddlers.”

Glee honours kiddy fiddlers

Some of the songs set to guarantee huge royalty cheques to those heroic figures are: Gary Glitter’s entirely appropriate ‘Do you wanna touch me’, Motorhead’s ‘Jailbait’ and Elvis Presley’s little known ballad ‘I’ve been living with 14 year-old Priscilla Presley and it makes me feel like a real man’.

We asked Glee’s creator Ryan Murphy what he thought about the controversy surrounding this episode, he told us, “I don’t think it really matters, I mean, I know the songs are really old but just look at what we did to that Journey song.”

“A whole new generation of organic consumption units got to hear a watered down, homogenised version of ‘Don’t stop believing’ and I have a dream that we can do that to all known music.”

A fan of Glee told us “I’m so happy that Michael Jackson can finally get the recognition he deserves, not only for his fantastic pop music, but for popularising completely inappropriate relationships with children.”

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