Thursday 10 March 2011

Fred Goodwin super injunction forgot to prevent his identification as a ‘devious prick’


The super injunction obtained by former RBS Chief Executive Fred Goodwin which prevents him being identified as a ‘banker’ has accidentally left the door open for everyone to continue referring to him as a ‘devious prick’.

News of the super injunction broke today after his lawyers admitted they also forgot to block anyone making reference to him as a ‘pompous arsehole’ and ‘despicable shit’.

A spokesperson for his lawyers said, “We’re embarrassed by this oversight, obviously.”

“Sure, no-one can refer to him as a banker any more, which is great as I’m sure everyone has already forgotten that he was in charge of the biggest banking failure in recent memory.”

“So we’ve sort of done our job, I guess.”

“Unfortunately, if we were to block every descriptive noun used in conjunction with his name then our court submissions would run into the thousands of pages.”

“We could try and block ‘devious prick’, but them someone would call him an ‘evasive bastard’.  It seems that people’s fervour when it comes to creative ways to describe Fred Goodwin really does know no bounds.”

Fred Goodwin’s Super Injunction

People who don’t have half a million a year pensions funded by the state have said they’re surprised at the legal move from Goodwin to prevent his description as a banker.

Sheila Jones told us, “Aren’t they supposed to be used in suppressing something you don’t want to reach the public domain? Like Ashley Cole getting a phone stuck up his arse as a completely made up example?”

“If Fred Goodwin wants to stop people thinking he’s a banker, then I suggest he moves to some mid-African country and pray he doesn’t bump into anyone who’s read an English newspaper in the last 12 months.”

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