Wednesday 26 January 2011 by Gary Stanton

Andy Gray threatens to burn copy of The Female Eunuch


Former Sky Sports presenter Andy Gray angered feminists last night after a Youtube video emerged of him threatening to torch a copy of Germaine Greer’s The Female Eunuch using lighter fluid and a box of Swan Vestas.

The video, which has since gone viral, sees Gray laughing with fellow presenter Richard Keys and holding aloft a paperback version of the seminal 1970’s text before referring to Greer as a ‘big fucking lezza’ who should ‘know when to keep her trap shut’.

Gray’s objections focus primarily on Greer’s contention that the traditional suburban nuclear family unit represses female sexuality, distorting their sense of self and separating them from their libido, effectively rendering them eunuchs – which he insists in ‘bollocks’.

The former Everton player uses the ten minutes to create a devastating critique, at the centre of which is his assertion that most women, in his experience, are basically gagging for it, and those that aren’t are either frigid or gay.

He goes on to say that the whole ‘men hating women’ thing is “complete arse” and presents a skilful counter argument in which he states that he and most of his mates actually love women, especially ones with big juicy tits.

Andy Gray fired from Sky Sports

Last night men across the UK agreed that the video was “essentially provocative“ and urged Gray to “not be a fucking pillock”, adding that, if he’s daft enough to go ahead with the stunt, it would lead to no end of earache off the missus.

Analysts, meanwhile, believe Gray’s latest outburst is set to push back the feminist cause in Britain by thirty years or more with men reprising their roles as boorish sexist oafs and an increasing number of women making a welcome return to the kitchen.

Joanna Goodier, Head of Womens’ Studies at Cambridge University, said “Mr. Gray does seem to have identified a number of flaws in Greer’s analysis.”

“But he doesn’t really help his case by suggesting that he’d like to do her from behind while she leans forward to fetch him the remote.”

Glasgow resident Angus Williams concluded, “Look, let’s get a bit of perspective here.  If we chucked all of the male chauvinists out of Scotland, all you’d be left with is a country full of pretty little ladies who didn’t know how to do anything.”

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