Friday 24 December 2010

Queen to focus on merits of 4-4-2 vs 4-5-1 in Christmas Day speech


This year’s Queen’s speech is to have a sporting theme as the Queen discusses the relative merits of various continental style football formations available to modern teams.

The speech is expected to mirror conversations across the country, as the debate rages on as to whether you can really gain long term success playing just one up front.

In a pre-recorded message, the Queen will tell the nation, “Sport plays a tremendous part in the lives of so many at this time year, but still we can’t agree upon the best formation that offers free-flowing attacking football whilst also guaranteeing a resilient defence.”

“I for one have spent much of this year looking at the pros and cons of all alternatives, and I am confident that the more traditional 4-4-2 offers the level flexibility required by modern tacticians.”

“One must consider the fans, and the entertainment derived from such a potentially negative formation when having one up front.”

Queen’s Speech

The Queen’s speech is likely to be considered controversial, not only due to the unusual subject matter, but also due to the current dearth of traditional wingers in the modern game.

Football fan and monarchy expert Tom Williams told us, “She doesn’t know what she’s talking about, frankly.”

“4-4-2 is too rigid against a modern team with the flexibility to switch from 4-3-3 to 4-5-1 when under pressure.”

However the Queen is likely to address such concerns at approximately 3:03pm tomorrow afternoon.

She will tell viewers, “Properly deployed, a 4-4-2 can offer you  strong defensive unit when you have strong full-backs and ask the wingers to tuck inside when they lose the ball.  Plus you then have the option of effectively four forwards when you’re attacking.”

“I look forward to seeing this approach adopted throughout 2011 and beyond.  Merry Christmas.”

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