Wednesday 22 December 2010

Supermarket dominance could see end of one pound beans, warn corner shops


As figures showed that the big four supermarkets opened 577 stores last year, independent shop owners have warned that vastly overpriced produce from your local corner shop could become a thing of the past.

Tesco, Sainsbury’s, Asda and Morrisons now dominate the grocery shopping market, making it almost entirely unnecessary for anyone to be legally mugged by an independent shop owner.

As one shopper told us, “Buying groceries in a corner shop is liking buying coffee at a service station.  You only do it when you absolutely have to, and you leave feeling like you’ve been raped.”

“If you want to know how much Tesco will be charging for a pint of milk in the year 2020, go and buy a pint of milk from a corner shop this afternoon.”

“Frankly, if you can’t be bothered to go to a proper supermarket, then maybe you deserve to be ripped off?”

Supermarket dominance

Independent retailers have criticised the increase in supermarket approvals, insisting their stores fill an important gap for people too lazy to go to an actual supermarket.

One shop owner told us, “Sometimes the supermarket is just too far if all you need is a loaf of bread and a Mars bar, and we’re only a couple of quid more expensive if you buy them from us – if you take into account about five miles worth of petrol you’d save.”

“Sure, you might spend the afternoon feeling slightly nauseous for spending way too much one something you didn’t really need, but at least it was easy to spend it.”

“Oh, and unlike the big chains, we actively encourage shoppers to come in wearing their pyjamas.”

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