Early estimates have shown that rioting Birmingham fans celebrating last night’s Carling Cup victory over Aston Villa are said to have caused tens of thousands of pounds worth of improvements to St Andrews stadium.
The game ended 2-1 with a late winner from Nikola Zigic, a man apparently cloned from Peter Crouch with everything except his footballing ability.
Birmingham fans celebrated the final whistle by undertaking an immediate remodelling exercise of the seating areas throughout the stadium.
As one commentator explained, “Any club that has ever hosted Birmingham City understands that toilets will be ripped from the floor, and sinks smashed, and seats ripped out – but we didn’t realise they do this sort of thing when they’re playing at home.”
“It was cold, but hundreds of fans were happy to stay behind to cause as much improvement as they could.”
Second City Derby
Television pictures showed flares being thrown between rival groups of fans, something which was explained away by leading Birmingham re-modellers.
“It’s a health and safety issue. It was important we used the flares to ensure we could see what they were doing. It’s difficult to rip seats from their concrete setting when you’re in the dark.”
A leading Villa fan concurred, explaining, “We’re community spirited, obviously so when we saw the Birmingham fans were indulging in a bit of remodelling, we decided to join in too.”
“Fortunately they shared the flares, and we passed them backwards and forwards so we could both see what we were doing.”