Wednesday 29 September 2010

Iran to consider stoning ban after participant tears rotator cuff


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Iran is to consider changing the law surrounding the stoning of women guilty of adultery, after a man recently tore a rotator cuff hurling a rock at the guilty party’s head.

Stoning has been part of the Iranian legal system for thousands of years, but this latest tragic incident is likely to cause a rethink among the country’s leading clerics.

An Iranian justice official explained, “This is a terrible, terrible tragedy.  We understand that even after six-to-eight weeks of intense physiotherapy he may still need surgery to correct the underlying injury caused by vigorously throwing stones at a woman’s face.

“This might the be the straw that breaks the woman’s back and finally leads to us updating the ways in which we kill adulterous women.”

Stoning fan Sardegh Yusuf said these types of injuries were all too common, and showed just how dangerous a stoning can be for those taking part.

He said, “This is the 21st century, surely we should be throwing lasers at our adulterous women by now?

“I’d happily swing a lightsaber – or something similar – in her general direction, rather than endangering my own health by hurling potentially heavy rocks without proper health and safety training.”

Iranian officials have insisted that all stoning participants are given thorough stone throwing training, and are warned about the danger of overextending the shoulder joint.

“A good stoning can last thirty to forty minutes, so there’s no point throwing the first rocks as hard as you can, as you’ll be exhausted before she’s even on the ground.

“And that’s how someone can get seriously hurt.”

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