Thursday 23 September 2010

Titus Bramble’s defence to fall over, allowing prosecution tap-in


After Sunderland’s Titus Bramble was bailed following allegations relating to a rape incident in Newcastle, fans everywhere are already eagerly anticipating the calamitous mistake his defense will make ensuring an easy prosecution tap-in.

Sunderland’s chairman Niall Quinn said the 29-year-old denied any wrongdoing and that the club will stand by him right up until a brief lapse in concentration almost certainly results in a guilty conviction.

Sunderland fan Lee Allen told reporters, “I’m sure that his defense will look great for about 95% of the trial, but you just know that there’s a ridiculous mistake in there waiting to happen.”

“It’ll probably be a gift to the prosecution, or maybe even a calamatous own-goal in which his teams says he actually did it.”

“It’s the Titus Bramble way, and like a motor-way car crash I simply can’t take my eyes off it.”

Rape Allegation

Legal commentators are already speculating that mistakes at the highest level, and on the biggest stage, are likely to cost Bramble dearly, warning that those stages don’t come much bigger than a rape allegation.

“Early in his career he could afford to make mistakes with things like speeding tickets or the odd parking fine.  Slipping up there is forgivable, as people forget those mistakes.”

“But you have to remember that this is the big league now, and now when he inevitable tumbles over in comical fashion gifting a win to the opposition, it will not easily be forgotten.”

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