Wednesday 15 September 2010

Large numbers of idiots still believing second-hand car salesmen


A new survey has shown that a large of number of people still seem to believe the mileage and other words that leave the mouths of second-hand car salesmen.

The Office of Fair Trading said that despite years of perpetuating the stereotype, many consumers still believed terms such as “good little runner”, “one old lady owner who barely took it over 50”, “I know it looks like it’s done more but that low mileage is real”.

A spokesperson for the OFT said, “It’s like banging our heads against a brick wall, it really is.”

“People continue to be unhappy with cars they’ve bought from second hand car salesmen, despite knowing full well that every single thing they were told about the car is almost certainly going to be lie.”

“A good tip when listening to one of these people is to pretend you’re being sold the car by a member of the coalition government, it tends to make it easier to spot the obvious bullshit.”

Second hand cars

Not all consumers felt that second-hand car dealers were a bad way to procure a new vehicle, with 35 year-old Mike Smith saying he has never had a problem, and has secured many bargains over the years.

“It’s all about doing the proper research before you talk to them,” he said.

“First of all find out their address, the names of their children, where their wife works, and then drop these details into the conversation.”

“I tend to find I get a much more honest appraisal of a car when I ask what their wife Jane would think if I parked it outside their house at 25 Waverley Close before she goes to pick the kids Henry and Emily up from school.”

“A couple of hours on the Internet and plenty of piercing eye contact can save you thousands in the long run.”

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