Tuesday 22 June 2010

Bleakley to continue career of looking good compared to Adrian Chiles


Christine Bleakley is to move from the BBC to ITV in a multi-million pound deal, allowing her to continue her burgeoning career of looking good compared to Adrian Chiles.

Bleakley, who has already built a successful career on looking comparatively proficient when sat next to West Bromwich’s finest, had been left looking for a new opportunity after the BBC withdrew its contract offer having seen her present without Adrian Chiles sat next to her.

As one BBC insider explained to us, “It’s like that manky piece of fruit in your bowl, it looks absolutely fine as long as there’s a piece of rotting fruit in there that looks even worse.”

“But once ITV spunk £6m on that really rotten piece of fruit, your slightly manky piece starts to look exactly like what it actually is.  A distinctly average piece of fruit with an annoying accent.”

Presenting

A spokesperson for Bleakley explained that she was already looking forward once again looking borderline competent when sat next to Adrian Chiles.

“This is a massive opportunity for Christine.  The role of looking good compared to Adrian Chiles is a much sought after one, and we’re delighted to be joining ITV whilst being paid several million pounds for doing so.  So keep watching those adverts!”

It is expected Bleakley will also be responsible for presenting shows considered just too demeaning by Ant ‘n’ Dec and Vernon Kay.

BBC spokesperson concluded, “Part of me is sad to see her go, after all. this is a woman who can make our new presenter Jason Manford look like Oscar Wilde.”

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