Wednesday 16 June 2010

Sky One to trial new show containing zero James Corden


Sky One has announced plans for a new TV show that will not be written by, presented by, include appearances of, or contain even trace elements of James Corden.

The move is seen as a risk for the satellite broadcaster, as since early 2009 all new television commissions have been forced to include at least 10% James Corden in order to be approved by industry regulators.

Television analyst Tom Brody explained, “Yes, it’s a break from the current received wisdom – but I think they might just be on to something.  I honestly believe that the world might be ready for a show without any sign whatsoever of James Corden.”

A Sky spokesperson explained their decision, saying “We know that this could fail spectacularly, as James Corden is now synonymous with television, but we think it’s worth the risk to push the boundaries of modern televisual entertainment.”

Charity

Even charities such as Sport Relief, and national institutions such as Doctor Who were not allowed national television coverage unless they included the requisite minimum amount of James Corden.

Brody continued, “We’ve got so used to having James Corden involved in every single thing on the television, that we’ve forgotten that it doesn’t need to be this way.”

“Remember what television was like in 5 BC. Five years Before Corden?  It was actually quite good some of the time – I see no reason why we can’t return to those halcyon days.”

Viewers across the country are less certain however, with Wendy Cheadle, 27, worriedly explaining, “How will I know the show is even real if there’s no James Corden in it?  I might be having a dream.  A really vivid, terrifying dream in which all television isn’t entirely shit.”

“If Sky want people to actually watch a new show and not spend the time wondering when James Corden is going to appear, why not just reduce his involvement gradually rather than go cold turkey?”

“I genuinely feel this could be the end of Sky television.”

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