Thursday 6 May 2010

Nigel Farage’s plane crash caused by EU rules on towing banners, claim UKIP


After UKIP leader Nigel Farage crashed his light aircraft into an airfield, a UKIP spokesperson has made it clear that the plane was only able to haul the banner which caused the crash across the sky, thanks to rules made by the EU.

It is understood the accident occurred after the obviously-tasteful UKIP promotional banner being towed across the skies by Mr. Farage’s aircraft was caught up in the engines, forcing it to crash land.

Mr. Farage suffered light injuries, and though the pilot was taken to hospital, he is expect to make a full recovery – no thanks to European Union policy makers.

The UKIP spokesperson explained that this accident was yet further proof that rules made in Europe are not always in the best interests of Britain.

“Let us be clear, the only reason that banner got caught up in Nigel’s engine is because EU law makes it perfectly legal to fly such gaudy promotional items behind a plane on election day.”

“If it was up to us, we would have banned it – but we can’t do that because of all the petty Eurocrats that you didn’t vote for.”

“I mean, what more proof do people want?  The EU nearly killed our leader – it’s time to vote UKIP!”

Crash

It is understood that the plane was built in Europe, with the banner produced by workers from outside Britain, furthering claims of conspiracy from UKIP supporters.

UKIP voter Terry Dowd told us, “Look, British planes towing British banners don’t just fall out of the sky, this tragic accident has only occurred because there’s been some sort of European involvement.”

“Are you going to tell me it’s just a coincidence that Nigel crashed on the day people are going to vote for him?  This day will go down as a near-miss, like UKIP’s very own JFK moment.”

“Now, I don’t want to be seen to be making accusations here – but this is 100% the fault of the EU.  Definitely.”

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