Friday 15 May 2009

Mugabe keen to implement UK government expenses policy


President Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe has called for his country to adopt the UK system as he seeks to overhaul his government’s expenses policy.

Following considerable international criticism, Mr Mugabe is seeking to rebuild his administration based on best-practises from around the globe, and he has identified the UK parliamentary expenses policy as perfect for his country’s needs.

“We have looked at the way the great democracies of the world handle their expenses,” said Mr Mugabe in a speech party members.

“But nowhere have we found a fairer, more open, less exploitable system than in the UK.”

“The West has been calling for us to be more like them, and I am here to tell you that from now on, we will be.”

“As we agree to copy the financial policies of our western allies, let this finally be an end to claims of corruption in our country.”

When asked if he would be claiming for the maintenance costs of the pool at his second presidential mansion, Mr Mugabe replied, “Come now, I don’t want to take the piss.”

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