Thursday 23 April 2009 By Dungeekin

Hawking comfortable after application of Norton patch


Legendary cosmologist and author Professor Stephen Hawking is reported to be ‘comfortable’ after previous concerns about his health led to him being rushed to hospital.

Professor Hawking, who is Lucasian Professor of Mathematics at Cambridge University and the author of A Brief History of Time’, is to remain in hospital for a few days.

Hawking has been treated by a team of specialists from Norton, who diagnosed the problem as a “viral infection”.

Team Effort

Medical specialists at Addenbrooke’s Hospital, where the professor is being treated, have refused to confirm the exact nature of the virus leading to mass speculation.

A hospital insider said, “The Professor had been suffering from two separate infections upon admission – a ‘nasty case of Conficker’, and a relapse of an earlier W32.Mytob illness.”

“Fortunately we raised a Priority 1 service call with Norton, and they were onsite within 4 hours, as per the Service Level Agreement.”

“With the help of the team from Norton Anti virus, surgeons have now rebooted Professor Hawking, and he is currently running in Safe Mode awaiting a full disinfection.”

“He is, however, expected to make a full recovery without the need for his original install disks.”

NewsArse thought it had a quote from Professor Hawking, but it turned out to be directions from our Tom Tom unit.

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