Wednesday 22 April 2009

Lots of MPs looking to trade in their old bangers, apparently


Chancellor Alistair Darling has unveiled his secret plan to save the UK economy by making it marginally less expensive for MPs to buy a brand new car.

A new ‘scrapping’ scheme has been brought in which will give all people, including MPs, a £2,000 rebate towards a new vehicle if trading in a car over ten years old.

The new rules will especially help those workers set to lose certain expenses revenue, but who still want to afford a new car to impress their constituents.

It is also of great help to the obviously many, many individuals driving T registered vehicles with over 100,000 miles on the clock who are planning to leap straight into brand spanking new vehicles.

“This is great news,” said one such consumer, James Shawcross, 27.

“My single biggest concern about buying a brand new car was the £2,500 worth of depreciation I’d incur the moment it left the forecourt.”

“But now the Government is covering most of that so I’ll only lose £500 on the day I buy it.”

“Which is great news in times of recession, right?”

Stimulus

This new stimulus package for car buyers has also created potential customers from those not previously considering a new car.

“I have to be honest,” said Tracy Jones, 26 of Bracknell.

“In this time of recession and job uncertainty a new car was 57th on my list of financial priorities, just above breast augmentation.”

“But now it’s up to 42nd and way ahead of getting my own personal Chocolate fountain like you see at weddings.”

“So who knows.  If no more banks go bust, and I don’t lose my job, or my house, in the next few months, I might just go out and blow £15,000 – sorry, £13,000 – buying a new car.”

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