Monday 6 April 2009

North Korea successfully launches satellite to bottom of ocean


North Korean officials today claimed a significant victory for it’s people following the successful launch of a satellite to the bottom of the Pacific Ocean.

The launch, which took place at the Musudan-ri launch site in the north-east, aimed briefly skywards before diverting directly to the surface of the pacific.

“Our scientists and engineers have succeeded in sending satellite ‘Kwangmyongsong-2’ to the bottom of the ocean by way of carrier rocket ‘Unha-2’,” state news agency KCNA reported.

“This is a great day for the people of North Korea.” Continued the statement.

Kim Jong il

It is claimed that the now submerged satellite is transmitting the “Song of General Kim Il-sung” and “Song of General Kim Jong-il” across the ocean floor – both references to the late founder of North Korea and his son, the current leader.

“It went exactly to plan.” said a North Korean spokesperson.

“People thought we were trying to put a satellite in space, but there’s loads and loads of them up there now.”

“What would be the point of another one?”

“However, the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea are the first nation on earth to successfully put a satellite at the bottom of the Pacific Ocean.”

“Let this be a lesson to the economically failing western nations, Communism works.”

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